How to Improve Self Image Project--day 2

Improving self image is not an easy project. However, one can take little steps towards a healthier and happier self image. Why is this important? A better image of yourself can help you increase your self confidence. Increasing self confidence can improve overall happiness.

Of course, we don't want to go overboard and be overly concerned with our appearance. Improving self image is not really a physical thing, it's more a change in perspective and how we see ourselves. Finding the positive things about yourself and being comfortable in your own body.

Many believe that beautiful people must have a healthy self image, however, some of the most beautiful people in the world are extremely self conscious about their appearance. Famous people have an even more difficult time because people are constantly judging their appearance. For example, the late Natasha Richardson has said that she didn't believe she was beautiful. Can you believe that? Even models, who make a living based on their appearance, have insecurities about their appearance.

On the other hand, some people who are not considered "classically" beautiful have a lovely self image. They find what makes them unique and they celebrate it with gusto. I really admire them and wish I could be more like them.

I hope you can see that a healthy self image is not actually about your physical appearance, but rather how you view yourself in your mind and heart. So if you feel good about yourself, then you will have a healthier self image.

All my life, I've been told that I have a nice body. My mother says that I had an hourglass figure since the age of 4, whatever that means. She would put me in little bikinis and let me play with water, in front of the house. People would walk by and whistle and call me sexy. It seemed that she enjoyed this attention, but I remember being uncomfortable.

In the Latin culture, hourglass figures are celebrated, but mother warned me that many Latin women are beautiful until they get married and have children, when they gain weight and lose their beauty. Perhaps this is when I started my diet. I was determined to stay thin at the age of four!

When I moved to the U.S., I was suddenly considered big. It was the early eighties, and people who looked like Twiggy were still considered the ideal. Already at the age of eight, I was fat. I had not gained a single pound, I had simply changed geography. This realization helps me to see how little girls could have their self image damaged before they even hit their teenage years.

I'm 5'6" tall and I currently weigh 164 pounds. Approximately 2 years ago, I weighed 194 pounds, the heaviest ever due to starting medications that reduce my metabolism as a main function. A year before that, I weighed 150-155 pounds and I was pretty happy with my weight and size 8-10. I weighed 135-140 when I was 18 years old, but a lot of it was pure muscle. Now at 164 pounds, a large portion is fat. If you haven't figured it out...my weight fluctuates.

Recently, I've been losing weight. However, it's not in a healthy way. I'm having a hard time eating. Starvation diets are very unhealthy and can make you very sick. Unfortunately, I just can't seem to change my appetite, but I will keep trying. I'd rather lose weight by exercise, but not eating and exercise don't go well together.

I think a lot of women find themselves in this dilemma. Our self image is tied to our weight. Not only do we care about the weight, but the percentage of body fat. We want the muscles to show and we want the shape to be perfect. What is perfect? It seems that everyone has a different opinion.

Now it's no longer good enough to be thin, we must also have the perfect shape. Of course, there are a wide variety of shapes and sizes of bodies. Which one is the perfect shape? The mass opinion seems to be fickle and constantly changing. So does perfection in body shape exist or is it a matter of opinion? I think it's a combination between trend setters, fashion industry, and public opinion.

The unfortunate thing is that no one is considered to have a perfect body. The perfect body is actually impossible for humans to achieve. Why do we do this to ourselves?

Even models are judged by their separate body parts (i.e. legs, bust, shoulders, etc.). In some ways, this could be useful. We can find the body part that we find attractive and try to emphasize this part in our dress. In this way, we highlight the positives. This can certainly help our body image, however, even this step requires an acceptance of some part of our body as beautiful or even pretty.

My objective today is to find the body part that I'm most comfortable showing and take self portraits. I chose my legs. I don't tend to gain a lot of weight in my legs, so the weight fluctuations don't affect them as much. I also like the way my ankles stay thin and how they look in heels. The feet I absolutely hate. So I've decided to do a shoe show, hiding my feet and showing my legs.



These shoes make me think of ballet shoes, but with heels. Normally, I tie the bow in the back, but I wanted the ribbons to take center stage (i.e. instead of my legs). I'm trying to put my feet in a ballet form, though not successfully.


This turned out a little blurry, but I like the way the right foot looks like it's a real ballet shoe and the left foot displays the shoe's profile.


This is when I realized I should put on a skirt, so I could take pictures from a farther vantage point (less nerve racking than close ups). These red shoes are reminiscent of the 1940's.



These are my purple and black Stiletto Mary Jane's. These shoes are seriously comfortable. They also happen to make me 4 inches taller. It always makes me feel more powerful. (The purple is dark and only in the front around the peep toe area.)



These are my purple ballet high heel shoes. It also displays my toes, which makes me feel self conscious. My mother said that since my second toe is longer than the big toe and there's a wide gap between them (can't see that in this pose), I should always buy shoes to cover them. However, I have rebelled and bought shoes with open toes, even if they make me self conscious. (They look more blue, but it's the lighting.)


These are my "Rock n' Roll" Stilettos. Originally, I was going to crop to just above my knee, but decided to show more, despite my discomfort. I actually had on a pair of gym shorts (I don't wear skirts this short.), so I painted it. These are the shoes I bought in Las Vegas.




Originally, I took this to hide my legs, but I like the effect of the shadow. I think it's the most artistic shot.

So how about you? Do you have a body part that you feel is attractive? How about your neck, your hands, wrist, shoulders, eyes, lips, chin, etc.? If you can't think of one, try to think of compliments you've received. Even if you disagree, perhaps it's time to take a second look. Does a choker (necklace) look good on you? Do long dangling earrings look good on you? Shoes?

Take time to think about it. Ask your positive loved ones. Try to believe what they say. Look for it, as if searching for a treasure. In my experience, everyone has something amazing about their appearance.

Share what body part you find attractive in yourself or what pair of shoes is your favorite! I look forward to your answers!